World Cup 2014: How June Will be Spent

ESPN just released its television schedule for the World Cup. So now I know exactly how long I have to get fit for a summer of drinking nearly all afternoon.

Thursday, June 12 the World Cup will begin on ESPN with Brazil vs Croatia at 4pm Eastern/3pm Central. I will certainly be watching that match. But I doubt I’ll care too much about which team wins. Every World Cup I pick teams from each group to cheer on. My allegiances are very uniform and perception of the nation-based.

Unlike the vast majority of American soccer fans I couldn’t give a shit less about the US national team. I think the USMNT is a worthless, dull team that will forever be just barely in the top middle of FIFA nations. Having said that, there are definitely players on the US team that I want to see do well–Mix Diskerud, Jozy Altidore, & Aron Johannsson.

Soccer: Gold Cup-Costa Rica vs Cubasoc_u_jozy-altidore_mb_576aron-johannsson-usmnt-soccer-player-biographyPoint is, I don’t believe that the US will survive the group stage. If the team does get out of the group stage, then I will be impressed and will definitely have to revise my opinion of the team. So we’ll see.

Netherlands poster

The team I back during the World Cup? Holland. Watching Holland when I was in high school & college (in the 1990s) is what turned me onto soccer, and I still love seeing the Netherlanders play. Thus, the Friday, June 13 match between Spain vs Holland at 3pm ET/2pm ESPN will be epic–a rematch of the last World Cup final. Here are the matches I’m going to be caring about and highlighted is the nation I’m backing:

Saturday, June 14
England vs Italy, 6pm ET/5pm CT, ESPN

England poster

There’s no way I’ll ever enjoy Italian football. It’s dreadful & ridiculous.

Sunday, June 15
Argentina vs Bosnia, 6pm ET/5pm CT, ESPN

Monday, June 16
Germany vs Portugal, Noon ET/11am CT, ESPN

Has to be one of the marquee matches. I can’t say I like either of these teams.

Wednesday, June 18
Australia vs Holland, Noon ET/11am CT, ESPN

It’s always fun to watch Australia lose.

Thursday, June 19
Uruguay vs England, 3pm ET/2pm CT, ESPN
My hate of Luis Suarez drives this, I hope someone breaks his leg…in two places…compound complex fracture.

Saturday, June 21
Germany vs Ghana, 3pm ET/2pm CT, ESPN

Ghana scarf

I don’t think there’s any chance of Ghana winning this but they’re my favorite team out of the African continent.

Sunday, June 22
USA vs Portugal, 6pm ET/5pm CT, ESPN
I just want to see Ronaldo tear apart the US squad  

Monday, June 23
Holland vs Chile, Noon ET/11am CT, ABC

Thursday, June 26
USA vs Germany, Noon ET/11am CT, ESPN
Once again, I don’t think Germany will lose but I would very much love to see the US play hard and win this match.

Since I’m too poor to venture to Denver to see Manchester United this summer, drinking at the various pubs of Lawrence, KS will consumer most of my funds for the summer. If you happen to have some spare coin or are just obsessive enough, Ruffneck Scarves has a deal for ya–a World Cup scarf package.


But it will be beer, burgers, and fries that will plague my bank account. As the Cup goes on, I’m planning on keeping a steady record of my beer consumption via my account at Untappd. It should be a good confluence of beer and soccer, in the spirit of my favorite supporters group tshirt (Red Loons, the Marxist supporters group for Minnesota United FC).

Soccer. Beer. Labor.
Soccer. Beer. Labor.

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